late at night

Tom Petty-“if you want a band, you should go back home. Go back home and get one.”

Karen Blixen- “All sorrows can be borne if you put them into a story, or tell a story about them.”

We packed the garage today. My husband and I did. 

Garages are almost as important as offices and kitchens. They are sort of the useful parts of a home. It’s where you go to look for a hammer and nail when you need to hang a photo on the wall, for a wrench to fix the flat tire on your kids bike,or the battery charger for the car that won’t start. The stuff that makes you feel awesome lives there. 

Now mine is empty. I don’t know where all that stuff we packed into containers will be going when we finally unpack it. I feel a little helpless for not having all my stuff where I can get to it. 

My office has been empty for weeks. It has been condensed to a rectangular basket next to my bed containing pens, bills, a laptop, and a few yellow folders. Tomorrow I will pack the kitchen. The kitchen is the heart of a home. Once that is done we won’t live here anymore. 

My grandmother used to make the most delicious sourdough bread in her kitchen. My brothers and my sister and I used to sit on the floor in my moms kitchen and talk. I miss that. I miss them. I miss that kitchen. My kitchen isn’t that one though. I won’t miss this kitchen. 

I’ll miss the few folks here that I call friends. I’ll miss my kids school, and the teachers that have made it awesome. I’ll miss the flowers outside my backdoor, the hummingbirds and the butterflies that like to hang around the red honeysuckle vine. I’ll miss the collards and mustard greens I planted that grew so well here. I’ll miss the sun in January. 

I’ll be ok though. The kids will be ok too. We will find other things to love, and new things to miss. What those will be I don’t know yet, but there will be a home for us to sit on the kitchen floor of soon.